Walking away

Due to recent incident, i have decided to walk away from any possiable heartbreak. I'd just couldn't stand being hurt over and over again. Why does it have to be me who end up hurting? All i ever wanted was to have someone who could be there for me but lately, i'm being hurt again and again and again. I'm through getting hurt by the people whom i used to be close with. From now on, i'm gonna be all alone eventhough it suck, but its for the best. No one could get hurt this way eventhough deep down in my heart. I'm going to miss the old me.

Why you asked? why am i changing from a cheerful and happy person to such a deep dark, twisted, quiet type of person?

I highly recommand you to scroll down and read my recent posts, you should be able to understand or got a clue on what i'm going through all alone.

My evolution has already started this morning, where i start to eat alone, walk alone, do my own job, no longer gossiping around with my usual friends, i don't even sat or had lunch with them no more. All i'm saying is that i need to be alone, no more hurting me emotionally. I'm though with all this crap.

I have something to share with you guys, last night, one of former best friend text me on my msn, asking weather i'am mad at him or not, i said "no, i'm not mad but i do admit that i'am hurt by what you did to me" he responded "nah, pls don't be like this, this isn't my intention at all, can we forget all about this and start all over, we've just known each but i feel like we've known each other for ages and i'am really sorry if i hurt you" To tell you the truth, I do appreciate his apology but i just can't take it no more plus since i have to jaga hati certain pihak, i think it is the best for him and his pengucapan friends that i walk away. I don't want to be that guy who embarrasses their own friend infront of their other friends.. (know what i mean?)

He tried to win my friendship back but i kept on walking away, lastly i said to him, "this is for the best for you and your friends, enjoy it, plus, somebody have to get hurt and i choose my self than letting someone else take the fault. For me, if his happy with his friends, i'm also happy even though truthfully i'am deeply hurt. I know i scarifies alot but i do hope it's all worth it.

With Love: Amirul